Saturday, March 9, 2013

Spanking, Guilt and a Blessing

I can now truly identify with Charlotte in this scene in Sex and the City II where she cried because her kid stained her vintage white skirt while they were busy making cupcakes. You can just imagine how frustrating it must have been for her because she absolutely cannot hate having kids considering she's had trouble getting pregnant before and had always wanted a family.

I don't have a vintage white skirt nor the skills to bake, but yesterday I cried because I hated myself for spanking Isha when she spilled her milk on the floor while I was working. I've always warned my Nanay, Tatay and sisters not to spank her because I believe that it's wrong to introduce 'violence' to kids as consequence to their mistakes and faults . I felt bad for violating my own 'parenting rule' and I felt awful for spanking her for being who she's supposed to be-- a kid.

In my defense, it has really been a very busy and stressful week for me. I had freelance dry spell in the past two months and am just on my way to recovery. My 5-10 hour workweek suddenly turned into a 40-50 hour workweek! You can surely imagine how difficult such a transition can be!
I knew better than to complain though. I've always loved my job (even during the time when I was not earning enough).  Besides, projects and tasks from new/long term clients are a blessing!

My new project. A blessing!

Being a mom and a freelancer presented me opportunities to continually grow as a person. The freelance famine that I've recently encountered made me feel even more grateful of new and long term projects I work on. My daughter, on the other hand, teaches me to be more patient and loving everyday. I may have failed to display patience yesterday, but it's a lesson learned. I am just really happy and proud that my daughter is very forgiving. I explained why I had to spank her. I felt so guilty I even promised to buy her a new toy on our next trip to the mall!

Moms, how do you discipline your kids? Is spanking acceptable? How do you keep a balance between freelancing/work and parenting without losing your patience? I'm looking at hiring a nanny (again!), but while I can't find one yet; please share your thoughts to help busy FreelancingMommy! TIA!

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